Irish Examiner Column 26/04/2021: On the merits of Staycations

They’re at it again. Flying kites. But this time they’re flying kites about the summer. After a year of warnings about bad things, now there are hints about the good things.  

The vaccination prodding is still there though. To see if they get an adverse reaction. Last week they jabbed us with a hint that the under-30s might get it before the 30-50s. People got het up. Not me. As someone who works in a 'creative' industry, my whole life consists of accepting that someone younger and less deserving will get a break I wanted. So I’m totally zen about when I get the one-two.

In fact I want to be the last person to get it. At least that’s notable.  Like in a table quiz when you know you’re doing cat and you wonder, “maybe there’s a special prize for coming last?”. So you deliberately get everything wrong in the hope you win a bottle of Aldi prosecco meant for the raffle.

There is talk of being able to go to hotels soon. I won’t let myself hope. Until I’m checked in and a man in Hazmat has to come up to the room with an ironing board, a toasted sandwich and a pint locked in a safe, will I really believe that we are on holiday.

At the risk of triggering pedants, staycations will be big again this year. The Irish being at home this summer on the beach with our Covid Stones for company is great for body positivity. Being beach body ready will just mean “DID YOU BRING TOGS?”. We will all lie there wobbling at each other. Not giving a shite about the little white un-sunburnt lines in our roll-folds.

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